Tuesday, April 6, 2010

One Wish:

I think if I could be granted any wish right now, I wouldn’t wish for world peace or an endless supply of money or even the greatest love of my life.

No, I think I’d wish for something stranger. Well a stranger thing than most people would find themselves wishing anyway.

I think I’d wish to give my voice box to someone who would put it to better use than I do.

It’s like I’m wasting this great gift. And if I’m not going to use it to its full potential, then why not give it to someone who would, ya know?

I don’t know. It’s been an odd week so far already. Yesterday, I gave a lot of thought to the idea of transferring. Today, I realized that there would be no point in going through that hassle when I’m already half way done with schooling.
A lot of people would just tell me I need a break, and that summer is coming so I’ll get just that. But really, I don’t think so. I think I need to travel. I think I need to just take off. And if I weren’t so anchored here in Michigan, I think I would. But that’s the great thing about reality, isn’t it? It’s that when we desire to do something completely spontaneous and crazy that could potentially ruin everything, we can’t because the reality of things is that it isn’t the right timing, or it isn’t possible financially (etc.).

I think I’d like to write something that matters to people. And I think I want people to want to read it. And connect with it. But there are just so many things to write about in life that I wouldn’t know remotely where to start. And then I’d have to actually make it interesting after I find that starting point, haha. Fat chance.

I wish I could write in pictures.

Then again, isn’t that what movies are supposed to be for? That’s not what I mean though. You’re smart- I bet you understand what I’m saying.

I wonder if my thoughts are what keep me from sleeping soundly. Man, I’ve been having a lot of strange nightmares lately. And I often dream about people that I don’t know personally. Like, I’ve met them maybe once and then they show up in my dreams like I’ve known them my whole life. It’s odd. I wonder if it’s odd that I find nightmares fascinating now. Maybe it’s because I don’t want to let myself fear. We can’t be led by fear, dear.

Well, in the completely normal side of my life, I have yet another paper to construct before tomorrow morning. I can’t stop wishing I were sitting outside right now though. It’s not even nice out. It rained all day here.

But maybe I don’t like the idea of walls anymore.

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